Every time a video surfaces of a child being humiliated or harmed by a parent, two types of people show up: those who recognize abuse for what it is — and those who bend over backwards to defend it.
A clip shows a mother cutting her daughter’s hair as punishment for being “disobedient.” The girl’s expression wasn’t anger — it was shock, betrayal, and emotional pain. A moment she’ll remember far longer than the haircut.
And like clockwork, the abuse cheer squad logged in.
The Defenders of Harm
When user @spicebae_ posted the clip with:
“the disbelief on her face when her mom cut her hair off for being disobedient, the daughters never going to forget or forgive her for this…”
…it should’ve ended with empathy.
But instead, others rushed in to defend a grown adult hurting a child.
The “If You Don’t Have Kids, Be Quiet” Argument
User @SpanishDuchess responded with:
“If you don’t have kids, don’t speak. Sometimes as parents, we are fighting against mental exhaustion. We want our kids to thrive and be successful. As a mom, I’d incinerate the planet for my kid. But he could also get this chancla the moment he acts a fool. It goes both ways.”
Ah yes — the classic “parenthood gives me permission to assault someone smaller than me” argument.
As if having a child grants immunity from morality, legality, or basic human decency.
Someone Speaks Up
User @spicebae_ responded exactly how any sane person would:
“as someone who was a child at one point, i will speak. if the only way you know how to discipline is by ripping the hair out of your child’s hair, you don’t need or DESERVE children, it’s that simple.”
Clear. Logical. Human.
Enter: The Abuse Apologist Playbook
Then came @noleprincess1, who went full defensive mode:
“You’re exaggerating just a bit. She didn’t rip the hair out, she used scissors and cut it. Besides, she isn’t abusing her. She obviously told her what would happen if she messed up with school and such and the daughter didn’t believe her.”
Followed by:
“The mother had to follow through or the daughter would continue to walk all over her thinking her mom is making idle threats and nothing else.”
And then — the most telling sentence of all:
“Just like if you tell them if they do such and such again they will get a spanking. Well, they do it again and they forced your hand in the action.”
There it is.
The belief that children cause abuse.
That a child somehow forces an adult — a fully developed human with impulse control, emotional management, and legal responsibility — to humiliate or harm them.
That’s not parenting.
That’s emotionally stunted people using violence because they lack the skills, patience, or maturity to parent without it.
Reality Check
The reply they received shut the door on the excuse-making:
“You just keep making dumb statements. Your response doesn’t change the fact that it’s assault, battery & emotional abuse. Also, no professional (teacher, counsellor or social worker) would agree with you. Say the bs you’ve been spouting to one of those and let’s see how it goes.”
“There is no ‘forced’, there are countless perfectly functioning parents that don’t indulge in physical or emotional abuse. Not only is indulging in those things morally wrong but it’s also outright illegal.”
No excuses. No loopholes. No pseudo-parent superiority.
Let’s Be Clear
Cutting a child’s hair in anger?
That’s humiliation, not parenting.
Threats and physical punishment?
That’s violence, not discipline.
Teaching through fear?
That’s trauma, not guidance.
Children do not force adults into abuse — adults choose it.
And adults who defend it are not advocating parenting — they are advocating harm.
Final Message
If hurting a child feels like your only tool, then the problem isn’t the child.
It’s you.
And if you’re defending that behavior online?
You’re not protecting “parenting culture.”
You’re protecting abuse — and that says everything.
@noleprincess1:
The Immoral List 
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